Confession Corner

I have a confession to make, rather a truth to be told. I really enjoy searching through and listening to thought-provoking ted talks. Depending on my mood I enjoy this more than youtube, netflix, or even watching a good "ol' fashioned" DVD.

Today I happened across one that caught me dead in my tracks, titled,
"Sherry Turkle: Connected, but alone?"



If you have 20 minutes to turn away from other distractions and listen to Sherry I think everyone can learn something from this talk. Ironically enough it inspired me to write a blog post.

Here's my personal story regarding the evolution of technology and social media in my lifetime. I'm officially in my mid-twenties this year and I did not get a cell phone until the summer after my junior year of high school. The only reason my parents allowed me to is that I had to pay every penny of the cost of that phone. I loved that white samsung flip phone. When I first bought my phone my parents rule was that there were no cell phones at the table, and must be plugged in downstairs by my dads cell phone. I would say the later rule was short lived, as any teenager does to stretch rules as far as they possibly can, and eventually my parents gave in. Soon texting began to be something that people did to communicate. It started with 300 texts/ month plan, then 1,000, then unlimited I could finally text as many times as I want. Around that time "smart phones" started to be a normalcy, and soon I got the first generation touch-phone prior to Samsung galaxy, with wireless and texting of course. Now it's 2014 and I own an iPhone 5 with unlimited text, call, and data where I can use at any time I want even internationally if I am on a wireless network, and be "connected" with a touch of a button. As I watched this Ted talk, some examples of communication and technology she used may have been extreme, however that disconnect between real-life and life online I see everyday, and fall into the trap myself. So as I wrestle with what she is saying I hope I can start to evaluate the boundaries I have in my life regarding my attachment to technology. Maybe one as simply as turning OFF my phone while I am at work, I rarely can look at my phone anyway, and why do I really need to have my cell phone in my pocket while caring for patients, even if I don't look at it even once?

I apologize if this post seems a little wordy and disjointed, but after watching this TED talk it really got me thinking.  

Community Dialogue on Race, Class, and the Zimmerman Trial

I posted {this} a few days ago to encourage people to attend (if available) this important dialogue and discussion occurring at my home church this evening. If you live in the twin cities area I think it is important to attend. It is intended to provide a safe and peaceful space to provide the tools to have a discussion with panelists and each other on race, class, and injustice in our society as a response to the Zimmerman trial verdict decided last Saturday evening. At this time it is appearing that I won't be able to attend because I can't find a substitute to work my shift at my job, which is really disappointing. However, I did want to pass along the information to encourage if you can to come. This is meant to be a dialogue with all races, classes, and ages moderated by a professor who I hold high respect for; Nekima Levy-Pounds.

I hope everyone is enjoying their weekend, and thanks for reading and stopping by this space this afternoon.     

Where were you on September 11th, 2001?

Reflections of the 5th grade me written on September 28th, 2011 as a classroom assignment asking us to write a personal reflection of the events that happened on September 11th when the World Trade Center in New York City, at the Pentagon in Washington D.C., and in the field in Somerset County, Pennsylvania.:

As I think back to the terrorist attack I was in my classroom right in the middle of vocabulary Mr. Right came in and said, "something happened that the kids should see." When they explained what had happened my heart jumped; where is my cousin? is he okay? I prayed that he would keep following the Lord and that he will have strength to follow whatever he needed to do. As I watched the replays of what happened I just wanted to cry. Seeing the soot and ash chasing after those people, and all the people crying/ running for dear life. 

10 years later...

As I go through my daily life it is easy for me to take for granted the freedom and safety I have in this country day in and day out. I take for granted the lives that have been lost since the beginning of this country in order for me to experience the world that I know as the United States today. As the 10th year anniversary of the September 11th terrorist attacks comes around I hope that the next 10 years can be a better 10 years but not only that a more peaceful 10 years. My prayer is that I will no longer be ignorant to the lives that are still to this day sent to fight wars while thousands upon thousands of innocent people die. Instead of praying for my cousin that was in the marines at the moment that the twin towers came crashing down, I pray for the thousands of other marine soldiers that are in combat to this day. I pray for the thousands of families that are affected daily with the repercussions and consequences of the terrorist attacks that one fateful day. I hope you take a moment to watch the video I {posted} earlier this evening, I initially saw it on TV during a football game earlier today, and lets remember to never forget, and never be too thankful for the public servants in our world both here on this land and abroad. As a young 5th grader at the time of the attacks I had no comprehension of what took place, but my parents now can describe a world prior to September 11th that may be described as more forgiving and unassuming. But unfortunately in this great world of ours evil does exist and I believe in the power of action, the power of prayer, and the power of good people doing the right things. So let us stand together and work for a more peaceful and forgiving 10 years following this anniversary.

{Lessons Learned}

How I survived summer 2011

Leadership {according to Cambridge}: 

a) the set of characteristics that make a good leader 

b) the position or fact of being the leader

Today was a day of reflection, frustration, hard work, and all of it for what? As I looked at various online dictionaries to look up the term leadership I was not very impressed. The end of this summer marks the third summer I was the Aquatic Coordinator at my local water park, and this is far from the glamorous full-time seasonal job that every college student dreams of. Though as it has been throughout the years I have seen many Aquatic Directors come and go, all with different strengths and weaknesses. Though after 5 years working at the water park in the summer, 3 years being in a management role, as well as the experience of having multiple jobs with very different bosses that have a wide variety of leadership styles I look back at the summer in review and reflect on how complex a responsibility being a leader in any capacity in the work place truly is. It came even more apparent when my boss resigned after working for just shy of 3 years at our location and since I was in a leadership position my responsibility went from mostly manageable to never having enough time in the day, or for my part time position that limits me to 40 hours/ week not enough time ever. But this is just a side story.

Being a position of leadership holds a lot of responsibility and in my opinion to do it well you have to be pretty selfless and expect nothing in return. This is not always true and that is usually when it goes horribly wrong.

Here are a few take-aways from my experience this summer:

1. Always be the first to volunteer to do a not-so-great-task; in other words lead by example not by expectation. Even as a leader you can volunteer to get stuff done, fill in holes in the schedule, if there is something on the "to-do" list that no one is willing to do, swallow your pride and get it done. That's what they hired you for anyway, to get stuff done!
2. Make expectations and roles crystal clear from the start; and stay consistent; I cannot say this enough, you have to lay it all out in black & white - quite literally. Write out everything via email, text, and copies so that everyone knows what the expectations are and then be consistent with the follow through. For some people rules are general ideas not set in stone, for others they are meant to be broken, and for others you give them an inch they take a mile. Decide beforehand what are non-negotiables and then live it out [YOURSELF INCLUDED!]
3. There is not just ONE right way! Be flexible, realize that there are always going to be many solutions to a problem and allow for the people around you to take initiative to be creative and express themselves, just don't forget point 2 :)
4. People make mistakes, but if it happens more then once then it needs to be properly addressed. If at any time your expectations are not followed, you need to find a way to consistently follow a strict discipline policy. Hold people accountable, after a few warnings most people will realize that you aren't kidding & they'll adjust.
5. Be authentic and Real. When you are in leadership everyone around you is watching, and the second you lie you are going to be caught red-handed with your pants down and that is a place no-one wants to be. Be honest, and respectful. Treat everyone around you in a pleasant manner, even if it is difficult. Everyone has their own journey and story they're on, and the more honest and true you are to them the more honest and true they'll be to you.
6. Love what you do. If you don't love it everyone will know. And if this is the case, that's okay! You don't have to do what you are doing forever, and maybe it's a good time to look forward and see what other opportunities are available to you. The best leaders are the ones that are doing what they love and giving 110% ALL the time. And don't remember the do part, more of leadership is doing than it is receiving. So if you're not in your area of passion and expertise this is more difficult that it needs to be.   

All of these things are things that I've learned, not because I naturally do them all the time without thought. But things that never did multiple times before realizing these really aren't just optional parts of being a leader; and some of the stuff really isn't glamorous or filled with instant gratification. In a world that is so fast-paced, and quite honestly self-centered we need more leaders that can set down their pride and ego and really think of the best interest of everyone around. In the above definition of leadership it says the "set of characteristics that make a good leader" though I did run across a definition I liked maybe even a litter better, but it said the capacity of being able to be a good leader. After a summer of the not-so-glamorous role of being in charge, take it from someone who has been given many leadership roles even at a young age stay in your strength area. If you are a hard worker that prefers to work behind the scenes DO IT! If you are a coordinator that likes to work in a pack DO IT! If you are someone who doesn't like to ruffle feathers or make tough decisions FOLLOW! It's okay, God has given us all a special patchwork of passions, talents, gifts, and strengths the world works better when people really capitalize on that special patchwork of abilities God gives us. After this summer, I am very glad to be able say to anyone who asks what I do is that I'm a full-time STUDENT! 

Nursing school t-minus 9 days and counting!   

{Words to Consider}

Photo Credit: {i can read}

     

     Today in my Certified Nursing Assistant training course at the local Red Cross Chapter we had extra time in our class so our instructor took the time to share an article recently written in the Star Tribune {website link}. It spoke of all the horrendous things that has been happening in the state of Minnesota long-term-care facilities of the elderly and how they are not being held responsible for their actions. During class when we read it and discussed it most of the people were commenting on the individual actions of nursing assistance who had abused their residents, physically, emotionally, and sexually and basically getting away with it scott-free. After listening to a few people's comments I suggested that the bigger issue at hand wasn't the fact that people were doing these actions but that the system that is supposed to protect us and prosecute the perpetrators weren't doing their job, and instead it was reinforcing what this photo says above, "We live in a society that teaches; DON'T GET RAPED instead of DON'T RAPE." 

     The systems in law are not working the way they should and are not catered to the people that are harmed where more than half of them are cognitively impaired and not going to live much longer, this shouldn't excuse the behavior or make the behavior okay. This should be more reason to act swiftly and meticulously on each case reported. Follow this link {here} to the article on Star Tribune's website and make your own judgment call. Let us remember if we have elderly in our lives that are in nursing care facilities, visit them often and unannounced because that can insure they are going to be safe and if somethings the problem you can address it immediately. In addition if you suspect any type of abuse is happening either at work, school, home, etc. REPORT it, call 9-1-1, assume if you don't no one else will and that person's life and well-being is on the line. Violence is a problem, not a solution. It is important to stay informed and do something when you learn about things that are happening in your community. Be Educated, Be Empowered.

Article: Violated: 'Broken' system fails elderly abuse victims

Author: Brad Schrade of Star Tribune

Date: June 9, 2011

Article Link {here}

Closer Look {The Fear; Lily Allen}

 Music & Lyrics

Closer Look

Yesterday in class we read an excerpt from a book, unfortunately my professor only gave us the PDF of the portion he wanted us to read. Anyhow, this essay was written by Sandra Lee Bartky titled: Foucault, Femininity, and the Modernization of the Patriarchal Power. Prior to reading and discussing this essay by Bartky I honestly had listened to Lily Allen for years now and not thought much more of it, and really I would maybe even put her in the category of music that I have as guilty pleasures, not because of it being poor music but because the lyrics can not be the most beneficial and border on problematic. After reading this article in conjunction with many things I have learned about our culture and thinking critically about what our statues quo is for women I think her music and her as an artist is a good example of being the product of the music industry and society functioning within a patriarchal power structure.

Bartky starts her article by referencing the findings of Michel Foucault and his argument that the way that our institutions, government, media, and society alike can now maintain the standard way of thinking by controlling people by the fear that someone is watching them and taking tabs on every movement. He uses the example of prison and that eventually inmates will follow protocol and routine solely due to the fact that they think someone is watching and that they will get punished if they don't, even if in reality there's no one taking notice. Foucault argues this is not much different than how people move about their lives in society. Now I bet one is asking...how does that have anything to do with femininity and patriarchal power?  I would say what doesn't it have to do with it?

Bartky argues that the same fear that inmates have of their superiors people have of the judgment they can face by peers, work, law enforcement, people in academia, the list could go on...is what keeps them from being different or an outcast. She says that this is particularly dangerous for women especially with the ideal of femininity and the expectations that come along with that. Here are a few examples...

Every morning before women are "expected" to start the day by...

~ Shower and clean themselves so they smell a certain way, followed up by putting on purfume

~ Clean shaven pits, pubic area, and legs

~ After that clean their face down so there is no signs of aging, pimples, or blemishes

~ Wear appropriate bra for whatever occasion

~ Accessorize and paint your face so that you can look "your best"

....do you catch my drift?

And why...even if it's not consciously because it is what society expects of a beautifully feminine woman but maybe even indirectly because what we can do to be "the most attractive" and get the most regards from the opposite sex? This doesn't even start to brink the surface of the long list of plastic surgeries and procedures women get to stop the aging process, loose weight, etc. etc. 

I could go on all day about this article and re-articulate the discussion we had in class, but I know you at this point might close the window and not even care what I have to say. However, during class my mind was brought to this song I had listened to many times before by Lily Allen. At the end here I have posted the music video and lyrics, and I want to ask you do you think that "the Fear" that Lily Allen is talking about in her song is the fear of judgment, imperfection, and isolation? Are all these fears caused by the same patriarchy that instilled the values of the perfect woman that is unattainable naturally and now has every women in America and abroad comparing themselves to this feminine ideal. I hope this makes you think about your routines as a female every morning and ask yourself why you do what you do every morning in order to be ready for the day?

The Fear - Lily Allen

I want to be rich and I want lots of money
I don't care about clever I don't care about funny
I want loads of clothes and fuckloads of diamonds
I heard people die while they are trying to find them

And I'll take my clothes off and it will be shameless
'Cuz everyone knows that's how you get famous
I'll look at the sun and I'll look in the mirror
I'm on the right track, yeah I'm on to a winner

I don't know what's right and what's real anymore
And I don't know how I'm meant to feel anymore
And when do you think it will all become clear?
'Cuz I'm being taken over by the Fear

Life's about film stars and less about mothers
It's all about fast cars and cussing each other
But it doesn't matter cause I'm packing plastic
And that's what makes my life so fucking fantastic

And I am a weapon of massive consumption
And its not my fault it's how I'm programmed to function
I'll look at the sun and I'll look in the mirror
I'm on the right track, yeah we're on to a winner

I don't know what's right and what's real anymore
And I don't know how I'm meant to feel anymore
And when do you think it will all become clear?
'Cuz I'm being taken over by the Fear

Forget about guns and forget ammunition
'Cuz I'm killing them all on my own little mission
Now I'm not a saint but I'm not a sinner
Now everything is cool as long as I'm getting thinner

I don't know what's right and what's real anymore
And I don't know how I'm meant to feel anymore
And when do you think it will all become clear?
'Cuz I'm being taken over by the Fear

Closer Look {HIP-HOP: Beyond Beats & Rhymes}

As I may or may not mention before I am going to school to become a registered nurse, though what I don't think I brought up is I am getting a minor in critical studies of race & ethnicity. You may ask what does that even mean? 

According to the {University's Website}:

A major in critical studies of race and ethnicity (CRST) provides a framework for understanding race and ethnicity in historical, contemporary, national and global contexts.

Studies are rooted in an understanding of race as a social construct that shapes identity and experience and perpetuates systems of oppression. Using a lens of race/ethnicity, you will critically examine texts, language, media, art, music, statistical records, social structure/systems and the complete array of institutional arrangements.

With all of this being said I am currently taking a communications course that credits to my minor; Communicating Across Cultures, Identities and Differences (CRST3101). Today in class we watched the independent film Hip-Hop: Beyond Beats & Rhymes.

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Film Title: Hip-Hop: Beyond Beats & Rhymes

Filmaker: Byron Hurt

Film's Website click {here}
Year: 2006

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This film is an candid look into a music genre that is filled with stereotype and a long history that has morphed and changed with the producers, artists, and societal expectations that have been placed upon it. If you have time I would strongly recommend viewing this film, it only lasts about an hour but will allow you to walk away hopefully challenging your views as well as asking more questions. I love having a minor that allows professors to discuss controversial topics, expects their students to ask questions, and challenges us as individuals how we can make a difference. I think the first step to changing out society as a whole is having people be informed and educated. Here's a clip from the first 10 minutes of the film, hopefully this will encourage you to watch the film in its entirety.

 

Does what we become desensitized to (especially in music and media) add to the problematic nature of systemic racism in America? Discover and see what you think.

Above photo credit: {film's website}